duff disks

If you have a very large pile of duff disks, or you are from FAST or ELSPA and you have a lot of pirate disks, do not destroy them! Recycle them my good friend, and you may even get some money for your troubles. Here are a few tips on what to do with those annoying duff disks...

NUMBER 1 : A KEYRING
Yes, you can have a very fashionable (don't snigger) keyring at a price you can afford. Simply place a keyring loop through the write protect hole. Jazz it up by applying paint.

NUMBER 2 : APRIL FOOL'S CREAM CRACKERS
Apply tonnes of butter and tonnes of cheese for that authentic cream cracker look. Great for annoying cousins etc... For the really authentic look, place in a toaster for a few minutes to give a brown texture.

NUMBER 3 : A PLACE MAT
Fed up with tea stains on your modern worktop? Stop those stains with a duff disk. Only 40p from your local computer shop. (Perhaps.)

NUMBER 4 : WINDOW SCRAPER
An icy morning and you cannot see out of your car window. Use a duff disk to scrape the ice away! A much cheaper alternative to the humble Credit Card. Also complete with keyring attachment. (See 1)

NUMBER 5 : A PATCHWORK BLANKET
Drill holes on each side of a disk, and simply tie them together using string. Use this method for various fashion (don't snigger) clothes. Be the first person to own a disk vest!

NUMBER 6 : MAKING OTHER COMPUTER FRIENDS
Yes, create a really wicked virus (don't call it HHome virus - it's copyrighted & you could get sued for millions of pounds!) and give it to a mate with a PC. You will have loads of friends (Oh, I'm being sarcastic!)

NUMBER 7 : SELL THEM ON A CAR-BOOT SALE
Pretend you are a computer pirate, and write some top software names onto the label. Sell them for £1 each, and leggit! (With the money of course!)

NUMBER 8 : SUPER DELUXE LUGGAGE TAGS
Similar to the Keyring idea, but writing your name, address & flight number on them in felt tip. You can then rub it off later and use them for another trip. Ingenious or what?

NUMBER 9 : NOVELTY FRIZBEE (OR HOWEVER YOU SPELL IT)
The ultimate kids toy. Bintendo carts can't fly half as well as PC disks. The ultimate Frizbee has to be the old BBC 5.25" disks. Wicked!

NUMBER 10 : SHARPEN THE EDGES, AND USE AS A VERY DANGEROUS WEAPON
Not advisable for anyone under 24 months of age!

NUMBER 11 : MAKE DISK PYRAMIDS
An ideal replacement for the traditional playing cards, comes complete with sticky labels, so you can cheat!